Music soothes the savage beast

What does music mean to you? To me, it means quite a bit. I was raised in a musical family, from my mother playing the guitar to my grandfather singing Irish bar songs around the house. From Janis Joplin to Scott Joplin I try to listen to it all, except for Hardcore Gangsta Rap and Death metal. Music is who I am, in a way. When i wake in the morning I have music going through my head, when i go to sleep I often have to sing to myself (internally). I cannot stop thinking. When i relax it's to music. when i write, it's to music. Some would say I need auditory stimulation to get things done, well, if that was the case i should be able to write with someone talking next to me...not so. Music just stimulates me. I am part of a band, The Hardline Monks, and we practice twice a week. During those times I just let loose and soak in the comradeship and tunes. We are finally starting to get some gigs around town and this pleases me to no end for two reasons.

1. I get to share the music we've worked so hard to create with others.
2. It's a release for me emotionally, spiritually and physically.

Now, I don't run around the stage ala Iggy Pop but whatever the song may be my body is going through the motions. Happiness, sadness, anger...etc. After a really good show I am exhausted. We have finally recorded our demo cd to get us some more gigs and it is taking some time to get right. I am a perfectionist. What most may deem "suitable" I deem "unacceptable". Is this bad? no. I want the audience to get as much out of the music as I do and that means that everything must be the best it can be. I don't demand perfection, because God knows nothing is, but I want it the best it can be. We're home recording and mixing and producing it all internally and that gives me satisfaction that our vision can be heard. Now if only we had more originals so we could also make a bit of change ($). So, where am i going with this?

I get very miffed when people let the mundane and frivilous get in the way of progress. Our biggest problem with the band is lack of drive and commitment. Not on all parts, but on most. And this drives me Nukkin Futs! Agh...to many thoughts, gotta sort them out. more later.